frustrated angry scared

Today had been a rough day for me. For those that don't know.......I'm 42 and I've had 2 knee replacements on the same knee......the first in June 2005 then then cement came loose and they had to re do it in March 2007. Now if you didn't know, a knee replacement is supposed to last about 20 years.....obviously mine wasn't even 2. My other knee has been hurting a lot and I've been told its because I have no cartlidge left and need to replace it as well.....which has been scheduled for June when I'm off work for the summer(I work for the school district). I was doing okay with that, but then yesterday, the right knee, the one I've had replaced twice, started hurting really bad so I went to the doc today. The x-rays show that it might have come loose again. I have a bone scan on Wednesday to get a better look........but things are not looking good. If its loose again......I have to have it redone yet again. Its extremely painful right now, so it will be hard to make it to June, much less any farther. They don't know why I can't seem to get one to work for more than 2 years, but you can only replace it so many times........at this rate, I could have to have an amputation in a few years.......or just not be able to walk. They say there is another kind of replacement that goes all the way down the lower bone in my leg.....through the center of it almost to the ankle, but they don't like to use it on someone so young because it wears the bone out to fast. But what options do I have.........not many. And my left knee still needs to be done as well. I'm frustrated.......I'm angry..........and I'm really scared where this is all heading. Joint replacement is a difficult surgery to recover from........painful, long, exhausting. I'm trying really hard not to fall apart........but I'm just sitting here on the edge. Crying doesn't help, yelling doesn't help.....I will continue to pray because its the only thing that can help. Please pray for me..........I need all the help I can get.

Thanks,
Kim